I’m still awake.
It’s 12:30am.
I don’t want to sleep.

I have nothing to look forward to tomorrow. Which sucks.
Or maybe I won’t even wake up.
Who knows.

I’m sad.

I wish I could watch a cool anime or something. But I don’t really know of any. Except for one. But I don’t know anything about it. Only the title.

I just watched the trailer. And I can’t get into it. Too jaded / depressed I think.

Anyway… maybe I’ll have a drink.
Just kidding. Just wanted to rhyme.

Have a good night!


Showering when Depressed

Here’s a support post for those that don’t shower regularly – because of depression.

It’s OK!

I know the feels.

Let me just say this first – I’m writing this blog post because I heard someone that I like say something negative about people that don’t shower regularly. And I guess it struck a nerve with me, because I don’t shower regularly.

And you know what, maybe they will be there someday too! Maybe they feel it some days, being tired of it all. Being tired of cooking for yourself, and taking care of yourself. And having no one to take care of you, some days.

It’s tiring.

And right now I’m feeling that, more so because I’m also depressed. I don’t feel like showering. I feel good enough right now to shower, but I don’t feel like doing it because I’m tired of the same old routine, day after day, week after week. And I can’t seem to break out of it.

I know that if I shower now, I’ll have to shower again in a 2-3 days. And I won’t be up for it! And I’ll just be right back to where I am right now. So it’s like, what’s the point!?

I know I’ll shower some day soon! But I CANNOT GET MY LIFE TOGETHER IN 2-3 DAYS.

I would write more, but it’s just depressing. So I won’t. Thanks for reading!



I don’t know why I started writing in this blog again. It doesn’t help to write down how you’re feeling. I still feel depressed most of the time.

It’s 4pm. I’m waiting for the only good thing in my life, my favorite streamer to start streaming. I don’t know when they will though. Usually around 4-5pm. So I guess it will be 5pm.

UGH! That’s all I have to say.



Today has been a weird day. Oh yea. I forgot it’s a Sunday. It’s pretty dead around here on a Sunday. It’s quite nice. Almost like living in the country side. But I have nothing to do…

So I’ve been bored. First I was depressed, took a nap, woke up feeling better, now I’m bored.

It’s 8pm. The day is pretty much over. I’ll probably go to sleep early and be up at 3am as usual. Because I don’t know if you know this, but I can’t sleep. I can sleep for about 3-4 hours, that’s it.

Gotta be up tomorrow at 9am to take a phone call from the sleep center I went to – to get the results. Hopefully it’s something good.


Good morning!


I’m (kind of) depressed. And tired. I didn’t sleep well.
I was in emotional pain last night, again, for no apparent reason.

So anyway… I kind of want to try to remember my dreams and write about that as well. But the only thing I remember about my dreams last night, is I was about to buy a bag of Doritos.

I went out shopping for a bit of groceries (at the convenience store) this morning to hold me over until Wednesday, when I get go to the grocery store.

Umm… I posted a Podcast, not sure if you saw that. It will basically just be a summary of my day for now, so if you don’t get a chance to read all my blogs during the day, you can at least listen to a 10 minute Podcast. Might even go up to 30 minutes or longer if I can figure out what to talk about… or maybe if I could get guests.

Anyway, do you have a podcast?

This is the link to mine! Check it out, if you want!

Take care!


Talking to my mom

Even though I’ve been spending my day talking to my mom, I still feel like it’s not enough.

I’m taking real steps to improve my life though. As you could probably see from pasts posts today. But I still feel lonely sometimes.

I’m not sure if I’ve already said this on here, but it’s difficult for me to be alone. That’s why I started writing in this blog again. It really doesn’t matter anymore if people respond. I just need something to do with my mind.

I sit at home all day.
I don’t have a job. (It’s hard to find one. Plus, depression).

So having this outlet is probably a life saver. Or at least a way for me to stay awake during the day and not sleep it away thinking it’ll somehow get better in the future. Procrastination to the extreme!

I hope my words are at least enlightening or helpful to whoever’s reading, but like I said, viewers are not a priority anymore.

I downloaded a program called Diarium. But I never used it. It’s to keep a diary. I would make all these posts private, but that just seems like too much trouble. Plus I sometimes like to scroll through them to remember what I wrote.

If it’s possible to make a private blog on here, with the ability to view the posts like normal, let me know. If not, this will have to suffice.

Ok, back to talking to my mom. :]