Thoughts

Desert Wasteland

Does anyone else feel that their life is sort of at a “stalemate”?
Like, nothing is moving. Almost like a desert wasteland.

If I could blame this on the planets, that would be nice.
Or, if I could find someone that feels the same I may feel better {about my situation}

What do you think?

Journal · Thoughts

Evening Update

So I wasn’t feeling good, so I took a nap. Ended up sleeping from 5pm to 12am! Now I’m probably gonna be up till like 4am — or just have a horrible sleep all night. Which is not unusual.

So what’s UP other side of the world!??

P.S. The nap didn’t help.

Journal · Thoughts

This Afternoon

This may be an “out of the Vortex” blog… but I’m going to post it anyway.

My afternoon has been good. I took a shower and got a haircut! And saw my favorite person that I know! 🙂 And got TWO hugs from them! 🙂 😛

Not so much out of the Vortex, but I’m going to listen to a YouTube video right now that might put me in a bit more! 🙂

Have a good evening!
Thanks for reading!

Journal · Thoughts

I guess I will be honest…
The rest of my morning hasn’t been going so well.
I’m alone almost all of the time. (A little background, I don’t have a job. I’ve tried looking.)
A video I watched about loneliness said to “reach out to people” but I have no one to reach out to…
… and no one can change the way I feel but me. Unless they’re a miracle worker.

That is all.
Thanks for reading!

Thoughts

4am

So I don’t sleep well.
I woke up, checked my phone, and noticed that someone liked me on the dating app I have. It surprised me because I just posted a random photo I just took, when I didn’t look so good. OR feel so good. And it made me wonder, could someone like me when I feel so bad? Or when I’m in such a mess.

I guess that’s what everyone is looking for, especially when they’re in the state that I’m in and to be honest, that’s part of the reason I even downloaded the app. The other reason, is to feel that way about someone else.

Thoughts

Hopelessness

I’m in a really weird space right now.
Ever since I was 13 I’ve wanted to make music.
But after going through what I went through over the past decade or so, things have changed.
I no longer feel the same about music. And I don’t know if I can make music now that I’m willing to try.
It’s a weird space because I’m thinking “NOW what do I do with my life?”
How could I have lived this life having the desires that I have had, and now not be able to fulfill them? My life is empty and void of meaning.
I haven’t had a true desire in years. At least not the same as it was back when I was young.
I hope and wish to get back to that place, of feeling good, etc, etc. But I don’t even know if it’s possible!

What do you think?

 

 

Thoughts

Bored.

I’m feeling pretty alright tonight.
Or at least I’m trying to keep it up.
It’s 9pm… and I don’t want to go to sleep until about 10 or 11pm.

So I’m just trying to stay awake and keep busy.
What are you doing? Oh, reading this. =P

I’m trying to deeply relax and just let things happen.
But things aren’t exactly the way I would like them to be…
And it’s really hard to just “Let it Be” (to put it in the words of The Beatles)
But I’m trying!!

So I don’t know who’s going to read this.
I have 53 followers right now. So I guess it will be some of you.
Hmmm… what should I title this? LOL Bored?
I haven’t really said much.
So yea, I guess that’s it. Thanks for reading! And I’ll see you again soon!

Cheers!

Journals

Still Depressed

Hello to my old friends on here. It’s been awhile. I’ve decided to start blogging again. At least today that is… So here’s what I posted on Instagram…

So I spent the whole day out and about until about 6:30pm. I haven’t eaten anything but I don’t have an appetite. I’ll probably eat something after this, as it will probably help me to feel better. I had a nice long talk with someone who helped get some things off my chest. But maybe they feel like they’re still there. All I feel right now is heartache. But I’m going to start writing like this as it may help me feel better to reflect on my day in this way. It’s 7:33pm now… I guess that’s it for now. Thanks for reading.

#blog